Culturally Preconditioned

The week-long DeepaRaya festivites has already started this week, and yet I am still at the office at 0645 hrs on a Monday morning. The things I do to for my company. I will probably be taking a week hiatus as I will probably be busy visting relatives and babysitting my 15 nepehews and nieces for the next few days. I’m not really sure what the traffic condition will be, but I’m not taking any chances and I’ll be starting my journey at 0600 hours tomorrow.

Essential Balik Kampung Checklist :
1. Samping songket
2. Songkok
3. 3-tier cage
4. Fresh kitty litter
5. Cat food (both dry and wet)
6. Litter box
7. Cat calendar (to show off the October 7th entry to everyone at home)
8. Mini iPod + USB charger
9. A Year in the Merde and Merde Actually and Kafka On The Shore
10. Sony Ericsson handphone charger
11. The cats (phew.. almost forgot them)

Survivor Recap

The Amy boot was totally expected. I liked her and I’m going to miss her. I’m not feeling much for the remaining people on the Nakum tribe. Bobby Jon annoys me with his stupidity. Brandon is just meh. Gary couldn’t get voted out soon enough. Danii.. well Danii I like. That said, it’s not any better over at Yaxha. I hate Steph with a passion. Judd is the biggest jerk to ever get on Survivor. Jamie is stupid not to realise Survivor is a social game. Lydia was missing. Rafe .. well.. not much impression on him. Cindy. Well.. Cindy’s gonna win this thing. No, this is not comping from any spoilers or whatever. It’s just a huge hinky that I have based on the observation from previous episodes. Cindy HAS that winner’s edit. Cindy WILL win Survivor Guatemala. (You gotta love the final shot of her cradling the immunity idol last week). The only thing that got me excited last week was Probst mentioning that they were gonna merge. That means.. brand new buff!! I can now go crazy and start pestering my bud to help me buy the 3 Guatemalan buffs to add to my ever growing Survivor Buff Collection (only 24 buffs to date).

The Amazing Race Recap

I can’t believe there would come a day where people would be rooting for the Paolos… but it happened. What is the show coming too. I gotta say that what All Stars did to Survivor, The Family Edition is doing to The Amazing Race franchise. It’s killing TAR.

NaNoWriMo 2005 (National Novel Writing Month)

November will be upon us, and it’s time to start writing again. My nano from last year (Daud In Distress) was a miserable failure. I still think I have a great premise with that story (and I’m pretty sure I’ll be getting lots of materials this raya season with all the kepohci makciks and crazy matchmakers… whoa.. I think I accidentally read that as ‘muthaf**kers’.. I think I’ve been swearing waaaay to much), but I’ve also actually started on a story based on a Fallen Angel from the Zoroastrian culture. The Angel story is wildly interesting, but fantasy is so not my genre, and it’ll be difficult for me to churn up approximately 1,667 words per day on that, if I were to meet the 50K word deadline. So I’m guessing I’ll be workingon Daud again.

RENT Ramblings

RENT will be staging in Singapore again. Lucky Singaporean bastards. I can always pop down to Singapore for a show. Yeah, I WISH. *cries* Anyway, between watching the Season of Love clip and the brand new Out Tonight video clip.. I am just brimming with excitement for the movie. I can’t wait to watch *cough*download*cough* the movie. I’m not sure if the movie will be eligible for the Oscars because they didn’t write any new songs particularly for the movie. Not that I care if it wins an Oscar or not. I just know I will enjoy the movie. Rosario Dawson didn’t exactly blew me away with her singing when I first heard the new Soundtrack CD (but only because I’ve been listening to Daphne Ruben Vega on the original broadcast recording for the past 6 years), but once I saw the Out Tonight video clip, I was floored. She was the perfect Mimi. This movie is going to be so good!

Well, that said, I’m signing off for the week. To everyone reading.. Happy Deepavali, Selamat Hari Raya and Happy Holidays!

Amazing Race : Family Edition - Episode 4

If you’re not that enthusiastic about this season’s Amazing Race, don’t worry. You’re not in the minority. Generally, 80% of the people that I know feels just meh about this season. Is it because it’s the Family Edition? I am still very iffy about the whole family edition concept, but I really thank my lucky stars that the rumour Rupert’s family was going to be on it, turned out to be just that - a rumour. Or is it because it seemed like a long-assed history documentary program on America? Who knows. Next week’s previews showed that the teams will finally leave the States. But if I don’t know any better, I’d say they’re just going to Canada. Pfft. Or could it be that the challenges this season are incredibly lame? Visit a trailer park? The world’s biggest office chair? L A M E.

But good news for us! The Amazing Race is coming to Asia! Following the footsteps of Fear Factor, Asians will finally be able to take part in Amazing Race. W00t! (but if one of the pitstops happen to be the World’s Tallest Pencil in Subang Jaya, then.. I honestly don’t know what to say). When I first heard the news, I immediately told my friends to stop all her plans and start making an audition video with me. We missed the audition deadlines for Explorace, so if we miss the deadline for the actual Amazing Race, that would be a major bummer. However, this was what my friend replied in my mail to her :

Sempoa betul, si amoi ni. But she certainly have a valid point. That bitch. Plus, if I were to make it on the show, I’m pretty certain 90% of my airtime will be bleeped out because of excessive use of expletives and cussing. I’m still gonna bug her to do the video though.

So.. back to the show.. the highlights for me were definitely the super awesome Party Bike (which reminded me of the Zorb they featured in the 5th Amazing Race) and the beautiful bridge spanning across Lake Pontchartrain in New Orleans (which reminded me of the beautiful bridge over Key West in Florida.

The HIT list

1. The Linz family - They still remain my favourite team. You can tell that they’re in this race for fun, and they couldn’t care less if they were eliminated (which is the same reason why I adore King Apathy Jamie - fuck this shit.. I am beyond this stupid show to care). They’ve proven they’re not the brightest of bulbs when they opted to go play blackjack instead of sawing the log when obviously they have the brawns for. I still like them despite their duhness.

2. The Bransen family - This team is the shiznits! The came in first place last week (and won a lifetime supply of fuel for each person - they are SOOOOOO gonna get laaid) and they pulled through again this week. THey have certainly exceeded my expectations and so far, I don’t really have anything negative to say about this team (which is rare for reality show contestants). ps. people may think that a lifetime supply of fuel is more than the million dollar prize itself, but it’s really not. RM 200 a month x 12 months x 30 years only comes up to about RM 76,000. It’s still a lot, but not as much as the grand prize itself. And those girls are still gonna get laid.

ohmigod.. I just realised that there are only two teams left that I want to root for.

The SHIT list

3. The Godlewski family - I’m back to not liking these ladies so much. Well actually they are a borderline case between the HIT and the SHIT list. But the whole “But I wanna bring my backpack - *cry* *weep* *wail* *selfpity*” drama was too extra H O R M O N A L for me to take in.

4. The Gaghan family - Will wonders never cease? Never have I thought that this team would rank so high up in my list. Maybe I’m just feeling a tad sorry for them since they came in second last in the last two legs of the race. Nah. The kids are not as annoying this week so there’s not much to say really. Super Dad had a comment this episode (paraphrasing) : “I can’t imagine how it’s like for a 9-year old to take part in this race”. But (not) surprisingly, he had no qualms whatsoever to include his offsprings in this race. Selfish bastard. Oooh and I just remembered why the Gaghans are ranked pretty high up. Snotty little princess had a wonderful quote “I don’t like this trailer. It’s eeeeevil”. That actually had me laughing. That also proved that this family obviously have their own opinions on people living in trailer parks.. so that kinda proved they are not really all that perfect. Two second last finishes in two legs. Here’s hoping third time’s a charm, eh?

5. The Paolo family - Oh I still hate them with the burning passions of Hell. But they surprised me for pulling off a great race this week. 2nd place is not too shabby for an everlasting arguing family. AND the younger brother had TWO great quotes this week.. the first one, you can see in this week’s blog quote (that was so funny) and the second one actually made perfect sense : “DJ (older brother) and Mom keeps arguing all the time because they’re the same person”. It’s true if you think about it.

The totally SHIT list

6. The Weaver family - OHMIGOD. Freaks of nature much?? They were pretty laidback this episode but their behaviour from last week’s episode still have that “what in holy fuck?” affect on me, and thus earning them the place on my totally SHIT list (and probably will till the end of the season). The weird twirling dance thingy from last week was crazy. They are crazy. Just flipping crazy. And they even make crazed Evangelist preachers look sane.

The MISS list

The Schroeder family - Is it just me or does the Dad look like a meatier and older version of Phil Keogan? Anyway, the Schroeders were in my HIT list for the past two weeks. The daughter came off sounding like a major B I A T C H. Stop bitching how much a minute or a second counts. We fucking get it. The dad was uber dumb for not getting to the right place even though he worked near the area before, but I have to give him credit to admitting his mistake. And it was a little heartbreaking to see them eliminated in their home town and weeks later, were hit by Katrina. I read somewhere they lost most of their possessions due to the catastrophe so my heart goes out to them.

Also on the MISS list from the previous two weeks.

The Rogers family - Also a family from Louisiana, but they were not that affected as the Schroeders. The dad totally came off as a dick in the episode where they were eliminated, not admitting his mistake and blaming his son when it really was his mistake that led them to their downfall.

The Aiello family - I hate the fact that the Gaghans beat them to the pitstop. They were a great family but they totally screwed up on the mud jeep challenge. Now we’re left with the OTHER Italian family. God help us.

Seriously.. how does ntv7 get away with this stunt. First they pulled Survivor : Vanuatu off the air, just two episodes from crowning the winner, then they totally skipped Survivor : Palau.. and now they dumped all four episodes of Surivor : Guatemala last weekend without doing any significant promotion and show Episode 5 tonight? It doesn’t really matter if you bring the show on air 14 hours after it aired in America. No promotions = no viewers. But I’m kinda glad they’re showing Guatemala now, so that I can freely discuss Survivor again with my local buds. (I’m still gonna opt to download the episodes of IRC rather than endorse your shitty channel).

Aahhh.. Survivor. It’s a shame ntv7 did what they did because in my personal opinion, I thought Survivor Palau was one of the most interesting seasons yet. It certainly had many firsts :

First season to have two players exiting the game within the first 2 days.
First season to have a Muslim contestant.
First season with more than 3 people quitting.
First season where an entire tribe was decimated.
First season a survivor spent a night alone.
First season a survivor was exiled.
First season a survivor actually gained weight. (LOL.. but it’s true)
First season a merge never happened.

and that’s just from the top of my head. In any case, Survivor Palau was also a first for me. After 10 seasons I finally managed to find a spoiler on my own which correctly predicted Ashlee’s boot in the 2nd episode.

So.. Survivor : Guatemala. For those who have missed the first four episodes.. well, you didn’t miss anything much. Two contestants from Survivor : Palau was brought back for a second time. Bobby Jon and Stephanie.. the last two tribe members of Ulong, the tribe that got decimated in Palau. Let it be on record that I loved Bobby Jon adn Stephenie from Palau. In fact, Stephenie was my third most favourite female Survivor ever (after Shii Ann and Kathy)

But how quickly the tide turns. As of now, the list of my most hate survivor contestants EVER is as follows :

5. Andrew Savage (Survivor : Pearl Islands) who always fails to take ownership of his own failures

((gap))

4. Rupert Boneham (Survivor : Pearl Islands) whose pity party won him the million dollars at America’s Tribal Council

3. Jenna Lewis (Survivor : Borneo) who cried for not getting her children’s video from home and yet unashamedly distributed her own sex tape online

2. Penny Ramsey (Survivor : Thailand) manipulative, racist, smirking Stepford bitch.

((ginormous gap))

1. Stephenie LaGrossa (Survivor : Palau & Guatemala) Bitch Extraordinaire

Episode 5 Cast Impressions

Nakum Tribe

Stephenie (originally from Yaxha) - Seriously, does she do anything else but whine? I just fucking hate her whole uncooperative, condescending, holier than thou attitude. She keeps complaining how she always seems to be on a losing tribe.. Ulong in Palau, Yaxha in Guatemala, and now Nakum after the switch. Guess what, whore. The common thing from all those three tribes = YOU. When will this bitch realize that she is the biggest loser in Survivor history? She IS bad luck. And here she is yapping Why Me? I’m Sick Of Being On A Losing Team? schtick. Get over yourself, biatch. Stephenie has really fallen from grace. From being one of the most beloved Survivor contestant to the most hated in such a short time. And that’s no exageration. Loser bitch.

Jamie (originally from Yaxha) - He’s been my favourite since Episode 1.. mainly because he’s King Apathy. I LOVE his couldn’t-give-a-toss Whatevia attitude. If you’ve been watching since Episode 1, you will know what I mean. That said, his performance during the Reward Challenge was piss poor. But I loved his “Who’s smiling now” cry of victory at the end. Kinda reminds me of Shii Ann’s “TAKE THAT!” in All Stars. He and Steph and not the best buds before the switch, so I still hope Jamie will have a hand in voting that bitch out of Guatemala.

Lydia (originally from Yaxha) - Crazy little lady received votes in all her past three tribal council. Lydia certainly stepped up to the plate this week (even though I do find her Queen of Rock and Roll and Do the Pancake dance a tad disturbing). I hope Lydia will go a long long way.

Rafe (originally from Yaxha) - the token gay guy this season. He was one of the active message board users before signing up for Survivor.. but so far, I’m not at all impressed with is gameplay.
Judd (an original Nakum) - This hot tempered guy reminds me of Chris from the 3rd Apprentice. He’s a loose canon and is constantly complaining as well (although not as bad as that whore Stephenie). I’m not liking him so much and if he goes far, his betrayal to the original Nakum tribe will definitely bite him in the ass.

Margaret (an original Nakum) - Margaret was a star in the first episode. But she’s quickly turning into Lil. The next time Nakum goes to tribal council, she’ll be gone for sure.

Cindy (an original Nakum) - I know the odds are really against her right now (she is so in the minority), but.. BUT I still have hinkies that she is going to be our winner this season. There has been so many quotes and imageries that has been pointing to her being a significant character this season. Watch out Judd.. Cindy WILL step up to the plate. Yep.. I’m willing to bet she’s gonna win this.

Yaxha Tribe

Gary (an original Yaxha) - Worst liar ever (in Episode 4) and he bores me to death.

Amy (an original Yaxha) - I like Amy. She’s got spunk. She does have that Twila-ish characteristics but it’s not that bad. It’s a shame she injured her ankle though. At least she has more balls than that fucking doofus Jeff from Palau (who quit after stumbling over a coconut). Go Amy!

Brian (an original Yaxha) - He claims he’s straight but I’ve got news for him. Richard Simmons is more straight than him. Ellen DeGeneres is more of a man than he is. Brian is even gayer than Richard Hatch + Jeff Varner + Brandon Quinton + John Caroll + Coby Archa all put together. And newsflash : describing yourself as metrosexual is even worse than closeted gay guys who claim they’re bisexuals. But whatever. Despite that, I think Brian is a little sneaky conniving bastard who knows how to play the game. And because of that I love him and would like to see him go far in this game.

Blake (originally from Nakum) - Pretty Boy idiot fell for Silas’ trick on Doc Carl in Africa. How hard is it to keep your mouth shut and not tell your tribemates of your luxurious lifestyle outside the game? I’m glad he’s gone.

Bobby Jon (originally from Nakum) - I like him before this episode.. right now.. not so much. Go back to your cave, Neanderthal Man.

Danii (originally from Nakum) - I like her. She’s got spunk.. and out of all the remaining ladies, she’ll be the one who can kick Steph’s ass out into the crocodile infested lake (which I hope she does). That said, I gotta say Bobby Jon and herself are pretty stupid for not realising that ultimately Survivor is all about the numbers. You have seen your original Nakum tribe members on the other tribe is in the minority, and now you’re doing the same thing on your tribe. How stupid are you people? Fortunately for you guys, the winner this season will come from the original Nakum tribe *cough*CINDY*cough*

Brandon (originally from Nakum) - He did great and smoked Jamie’s ass during the reward challenge. But that’s about it. His days are numbered. He’ll be the next one gone the next time this tribe goes to tribal council.

All in all, it was a pretty good episode. I can’t wait for the Jamie vs Bobby Jon confrontation next week. That was the best preview ever. It had me rolling.