Culturally Preconditioned

So we’re down to 10 teams after Jon Vito & Jill got eliminated last week. I was pretty certain it was going to be a non-elimination leg since they only have 11 teams on this All Star season, but apparently I was wrong. This week, teams fly from Ecuador to Santiago, Chile. Speaking of Santiago… Boomquisha Santiago aka Boomie aka Jennifer Hudson won an OSCAR!! OMGWTFYAY! Personally, I didn’t actually think her performance warrants an Oscar. It was really good, but Oscar worthy? I’m not so sure. But I’m really glad she won anyway. YAY FOR BOOMIE! And speaking of Boomie… remember the bitch who refused to clap for her during American Idol? Her cousin Whatevia Santiago?

Well I guess hell has finally frozen over cause take a look at this :

What a way to get off track, eh? (AND FUCKING PAN’S LABYRINTH WAS ROBBED!! FUCK YOU OSCAR VOTERS)

Anyway, the show started with them showing Drew requiring some medical attention because of the mountain sickness. Why did they even bother to show that? It’s not like the man hasn’t completely become a super ass already. Romber was shown in a confessional about their strategy.. which was to make other people paranoid and distracted, which I have to admit, is a brilliant strategy cause it worked! The other teams weren’t focusing on their own task, and it sure seemed like everyone was obsessed with Romber. And also what the fuck were Eric and Danielle mumbling to each other at the beginning of the race? Nevermind, I don’t want to know. Boringest idiotic pseudo team evah.

They also showed Mirna & Charla (”It might be chilly in Chile”) making some sort of an alliance with Team Kentucky, I don’t know how long THAT’s gonna last. I get that you don’t have to be mean in a race like this, but then again, you don’t HAVE to be SUPER NICE to the other teams if you want to win. There’s only going to be one winner, hello? Haven’t they learned anything from their six pack alliance from last season? Bleh. Oooh, and also there was also some scenes where Kevin kinda ‘towed’ their car out of the ditch, and dumbass fucker Drew hit on the gas, almost dragging Kevin to the ground. Seriously, what the fuck is wrong with that guy? He also went out of the way to become a stupid jerk by removing Kentucky’s luggage on the plane. Asshat.

Oh the plane! Romber and the Chas got on an earlier local flight with a connecting flight scheduled to reach Santiago. Unfortunately the connecting flight was delayed. So the other 8 teams got to Santiago, Chile first instead. Again, I love these airport drama. Something, or the ONLY thing, sorely missing from Amazing Race Asia (closest thing to this was the 68 hour bus ride down to Phuket).

The came to a roadblock to solve a boardroom puzzle. Mary actually impressed me with her ’skills’. Charla, on the other hand, was a disappointment. She should’ve provided us with some entertainment by doing cartwheels around the boardroom while Mary was solving the puzzle for her. Amber and Danny worked their clues really fast. I was totally laughing out loud when Eric went ‘what is it? what is it?’ when they already clearly told him what the answer was. Man, what a dumbass. I love Amber and Danny for leaving that dunce in the lurch.

Next, they had to fly to Calama, Chile. All of them got on the same flight and reached the Detour at a copper mine which was (1) By Hand - where they had to secure giant assed tractor tyres or (2) By Machine - to transfer gravel using one of those tractors. Everyone except Romber and the Guidos performed the first detour.  I super loved the banter between Charla and Mirna when Charla was bitching about looking around for a stool cause “I CAN’T REACH IT!!!”. LMAO. Love em or hate em, they are comedic gold I tell ya.

They next had to drive to the next pitstop through the Valley of the Moon (where the speed limit was 40 miles per hour) and the Valley of the Dead (where the speed limit was 50 miles per hour - a fact that one idiot fucker just cant seem to fathom). The only bit of drama here was when Charla & Mirna went mental with the taxi driver. In all fairness, the BQs kinda were freeloading from Schmirna, which wasn’t very nice. I totally loved Schmirna’s mental breakdown with the taxi driver. “Take everything. Take $200. I won’t eat tomorrow *CRIES*”. LOL Seriously folks, just think what TARAS would be without them (and filled with boring mactor numbfucks like Eric & Danielle).

It was an interesting finish, there were some footrace involved between teams #3 to #5. Footraces to the pitstops are always fun to watch no? All in all, a much better episode than the premier. It totally sucks that I won’t be able to watch the next two episodes though. Anyway, in the order of their arrival at the pitstop :

1. Romber - finished 1st twice in a row! Hate them if you must, but wow! I’m impressed.

2. The Chas - finished 2nd twice in a row! How can you not love them??

3. Guido - Still boring old farts, but for an old farts team, they’re doing pretty well

4. E&D - yuck.

5. Ucheyna & Joyce - still boring

6. Beauty Queens - They’re proving to be pretty good.

7. Teri & Ian - Not much out of them this episode

8. Charla & Mirna - I hope they get chosen for TARAS2

9. Kentucky - Not loving them. Couple of hypocrites if you ask me.

10. Kevin & Drew (eliminated) - I pity Kevin. Drew can suck on my two giant nuts.