Culturally Preconditioned

I’m not sure if many of you missed the first half of the show last night. It was a special two-hour episode that started at 8:15pm and ended at 10:00pm. Does anyone know if they’re still showing the show ‘live’ on Astro on Monday morning? This particular episode had a lot of funny moments and had me in stitches a few times.

FIRST LEG : Zanzibar was the 6th pitstop last week where Teri & Ian were Philiminated after being 16 hours behind the other teams. They next had to travel to Warsaw, Poland. Everyone were given tickets to arrive the next day at 11:25am, so everyone was trying their hardest to get earlier tickets. The Chas, BQs, Schmirna all went to a travel agent, while Ucheynna & Joyce tries to book their tickets over the phone. And wonders of wonders, Ucheynna & Joyce calls the exact same travel agent that the others were at. So agent starts talking on the phone, when there were clearly other customers in front of her. If you were the agent, what would you do?

Anyway, there was a lot of airline madness as some teams get to Addis Ababa and Frankfurt, some get to Johannesburg.. others Nairobi and Kilimanjaro, then Amsterdam. It’s airport madness like this is what makes TAR interesting. LOL. There’s too muchthings going on. In the case of the Guidos and Eric & Danielle, they used the tickets given by the producers but unfortunately they weren’t able to get on the connecting flight.. which is rather fucked up since those tickets were from the producers. But that is not more fucked up than Bill going on the airport tarmac and ringing what seems to be an ice cream or a cow bell trying to stop the plane. LOL.

Once they were in Warsaw, Poland, they needed to go to Czapski Palace which was Chopin’s birthplace. It was funny when one of the BQs thought ‘the real Chopin’ was still alive. Hahaha. Schmirna and the Chas arrived about 20 minutes later. The clue was a detour between (1) Perfect Angle - X-ray some mannequins to get their next clue (2) Perfect Pitch - to tune a piano key. The BQs did the Perfect Pitch task and having some music background, they finished the task and got their next clue which was to find the Jan III Sobieski Lazienski statue and find the PITSTOP on the palace grounds.

Schmirna and Chas did the Perfect Pitch detour. Chas finally got it right. Schmirna gave up (”oooh that sounds good don’t you think?” LOL tone deaf bitches) and headed to do the Perfect Angle detour. It does seem rather weird that no one on the streets wanted to talk to them. It was really .. i don’t know. Weird. I’m guessing they might have issues with midgets.  They finally found a helpful local and got their clues. (Funny line : “You’re supposed to cover his private parts, Charla!”).

Ucheynna/Joyce did the Perfect Pitch detour and actually finished it before Schmirna finished their detour. Eric & Danielle and the Guidos came next bla bla bla.. nothing interesting. I just wished they had ommitted Eric & Danielle’s banter. Just shut the fuck up already. Danielle is daddy’s little princess who’s dating a horny and sexually confused adolescent. They deserve each other. So in order of arrival at the first pitstop : (1) Beauty Queens (2) Danny & Oswald (30 Ucheynna & Joyce (4) Charla & Mirna (5) Eric & Danielle (6) Joe & Bill who are marked for elimination.

SECOND LEG : The BQs actually started their second leg before the Guidos have checked into the last pitstop. They next have to travel to the concentration camp where millions of people were killed during the Nazi genocide. Unfortunately for the BQs, the bus doesn’t leave till 1 pm (which was still hours away). Two other teams got on the 1st bus - Chas and Ucheynna & Joyce. The remaining three teams had to go on the 2nd bus which leaves at 5 pm, which was 4 hours later.

After getting their clue at the concentration camp, they headed to an INTERSECTION where two teams had to work together to perform a task. Ucheynna & Joyce and the Chas were the first to arrive there and they decided to team up. AND there’s a Fast Forward. The Fast Forward Task was to count the number of steps on two different towers. That was pretty easy.. and they can bypass all other tasks and head straight to the Pitstop. They arrived together, but the Chas gave Ucheynna & Joyce the prize for the first place.

Back to the BQs, they unfortunately have to wait an additional 4 hours for the next team to arrive. The first team to arrive (from the 2nd bus) was Schmirna! LOL I had been looking forward to these two teams working together. Eric & Danielle had no choice but to work together with the Guidos. The next detour was (1) Eat It Up - to make and eat sausages or (2) Roll It Up - roll bagels and make deliveries.

mmmmmmmmmmmmm bagels mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm

Schmirna and BQs headed straight to the sausages thingy. Female bonding over sausages! LOL First they had to make a few sausages, then each of them needs to finish eating 2 feet of Kielbasa sausages. Each. (Funny line : Why does mine look thicker? LOL). The other teams lost their way to the bakery, so they too headed to the sausage factory. And it was game on!!! I laughed out loud when one of he beauty queens barfed the sausages at the end, and Eric’s comment “Ladies and Gentlemen.. Miss California!” LOL that was funny. Congrats for finally making a funny line after 8 episodes, Eric. And Charla making herself puke by shoving that piece of cutlery down her throat. OMFGGGGG That IS TV GOLD!!! I have never laughed to hard.

They next had to go to a roadblock in Skala Castle. Why don’t people read their clues? It says DRIVE YOURSELVES.. not get a taxi. Pfft. Anyway, I totally LOVED Mirna’s meltdown with the taxi driver. ROFLMAO “(in weird european accent) please misterrr, show me some merrrcy. As a human being!!” OMG So damn funny… drama yg overdose. LOL. There was also her meltdown with Charla in the car :

Mirna : What are you doing back there, Charla?
Charla (looking stonefaced): I am doing nothing.
Mirna : What do you want me to do?
Charla (looking stonefaced): Yell at me.

LMAO!!!! They need their own sitcom NOW! OMG. My sides were aching. Anyway, they got to their next roadblock - Knight in Shining Armour, which was FUCKING AWESOME! They had to put on a full suit of armour of a medieval knight and direct a horse to the castle, then find the pitstop within the castle doors. OMG Charla looks like a troll!!!! OMGLOL. I am so going to hell for that, but it was toooooo funneeeeee. The two faceplants that she got looked bad, but I hope it didn’t really hurt her though. But I can’t stop giggling. That poor thing. <3 Charla <3 And her dialogues.. OMG "Please don't kill me Horsey". "Horsey, I have sausage" fucking ROTFLMAO. Can't. stop. laughin.

Anyway, in the order of their arrival at the pitstop : (1) Ucheynna and Joyce (2) Danny & Oswald (3) Dustin and Kandice (4) Charla & Mirna (5) Joe & Bill (6) Danielle & Eric. Unfortunately for the Guidos, they were marked for elimination and had to incur a 30 minute penalty, and as a result, they were Philiminated from the race.

NEXT WEEK :

A shameless plug for Visit Malaysia Year. It’s a must see, y’all! LOL