Culturally Preconditioned

The penultimate episode before the finale. Can you feel the excitement?? As of tonight, there were three teams that I wouldn’t mind winning, but seeing how this is the All Stars version, I guess the All Star curse will stick true and we might be getting the worst winners ever (case in point : Amber winning Survivor All Stars and my baby Janelle losing out at F3 in Big Brother All Stars.. although I would MUCH rather see Romber winning TAR All Stars rather than the pseudo asswipe team that is Eric and Danielle). I am preparing myself for the absolute worst. I’ve got six days to do that.

Anyway, in the last episode, we see the teams reach Macau which was the eleventh pitstop of the race. Danny & Oswald got the whole karma is a bizzle thing smacked right into the faces (hard) cause they yielded Team Asswipe (who deserved it). In their defense, I don’t think Danny & Oswald wanted to, but hey, they shouldn’t have made the deal with the crowned devils in the first place. And you pretty much see how mature Eric was. He was still pissed about being yielded by the Chas, even in this episode. Grow the fuck up.

Teams had to travel to Guam, and we see Mirna yet again adopt another foreign accent. Was it Spanish? Portuguese? I’m betting on Habibi. LOL. And am I the only one who noticed Charla’s not carrying any backpack? Anyway, Dustin & Kandice, Eric & Danielle and Charla & Mirna got on the first flight out from Hong Kong to Tokyo. Oswald & Danny got on the second flight to Tokyo, and miraculously, they all board the same connecting flight from Tokyo to Guam.

On arrival at Guam, they had to go to the Airport Base, where their military escorts will assemble in the morning. Urgh.. yet another bunching caused by the Hours of Operations. Morning comes, and it’s a Detour between (1) Care Package - where they had to take part in a humanitarian exercise by loading up 500 pounds of care packages (I saw a Spongebob Squarepants thingy thrown into the crate, I fucking swear) and drop the crate for care relief somewhere, and (2) Engine Care - where they had to scour clean a B52bomber wings - which I thought was weird since it had nothing to do with the engines. This looked tough cause it’s like scrubbing your typical bontot kuali times a billion! But those who chose the second detour, finished much quicker (ie. everyone except Charla & Mirna)

They next had to drive to the US Naval Base where a naval escort will drive them to the next clue which was a Roadblock of Search & Rescue. They had to navigate using GPS devices to locate an airline pilot, who will then give them new coordinates on the GPS device to locate the clearing so that they can call a helicopter for rescue.

Seems pretty easy, didn’t it? I can’t fathom why the reason why Oswald, Danielle and Charla had so much problems with it. Well, Charla basically because she can’t fucking stop touching all the buttons and the screen despite having told not to do so at least three fucking times on camera. And Danielle, well, cause she sucks Eric’s balls (which is equivalent to a donkey with syphillis). Seriously, does she ever stop fucking whining? Cunt.

Anyway, the pitstop for this leg of the Race isat Fort Soledad and in the order of the arrival at the pitstop : (1) Dustin & Kandice (2) Eric & Danielle (3) Charla & Mirna (4) Danny & Oswald. It sucks so much to see Danny & Oswald out of the race, and team Asswipe is still in it, and could very possibly well win it. Urgh. I hate that team. They shouldn’t have been on this race. They’re not even a real team. And the whole ‘relationship’ they got going on is a big fatass smokescreen that is so clearly transparent to everyone. I would love it if the Beauty Queens win, and totally ecstatic if Charla & Mirna get the million. But like I said, I’m preparing myself for the absolute worst.

Charla & Mirna for the win!!!

*keeping fingers and penis crossed*